How to Master the Art of Remote Mentoring

While the “where” and, in many cases, the “when” we work may be different, remote work doesn’t equate to working in isolation. Or, in the case of hybrid workplaces, having to wait for the “office days” to have some real connection with the team.

If we’re actively striving to create a remote-first culture, then our online workplace interactions can and should be equally meaningful to the IRL ones. And that should permeate every aspect of the workplace: not just our daily tasks or meetings, but also our collaboration efforts and our training strategy.

Mentoring in the workplace should fall under that umbrella as well.

An extremely valuable practice that can set up younger and returning employees for success, mentoring continues to be sorely needed—but it also needs to adapt for remote and virtual settings.

Consider this article your introduction to remote mentoring for employees.

The challenges of online mentoring

Mentoring is a personal business. And it needs to be so: mentor and mentee have to build a bond of trust, in order for the knowledge imparted to have any effect.

While this process is never easy, to begin with, it becomes further complicated by the perceived distance remote work brings. The idea of virtual mentoring feels counterintuitive or “lacking” for many, precisely because they can’t see how this bond of trust can be established without the mentor’s physical presence in the mentee’s work life.

Mentoring in the workplace doesn’t always happen in a particular room or in a specific context. A lot of it is informal and spontaneous—and these are exactly the qualities that people are unsure of how to reproduce in mentoring in a virtual setting.

Arguably, the face-to-face time between a mentor and a mentee is the best way to read social cues and see how the other person is reacting to what you’re saying. But in remote mentoring, the only substitute for that is video conferencing apps like Zoom or Skype, which can contribute to already existing screen fatigue. This creates a need to keep meetings short and to the point—which, in turn, takes away some of the opportunities to truly connect on a human level.

For remote mentoring to be successful, you need to adjust your strategy. Replicating what you had been doing when working in person won’t be as efficient.

Yet now more than ever, mentoring is important. With companies pivoting quickly to catch up with the changing times, and so many employees having to reenter the workplace after a prolonged (COVID-induced or not) absence, the already extensive skills gap is growing. A 2020 McKinsey report showed that 43% of leaders reported existing skill gaps within their teams, while a recent TalentLMS and SHRM study shows an even more concerning picture: more than 1 in 2 surveyed HR managers agree their company is facing a skills gap.

Mentoring can guide young and returning employees through the process of reentrance and reskilling/upskilling remote training in order to close the skills gap—before it becomes a skills canyon.

Building a virtual mentoring program

In case it wasn’t clear before: it’s absolutely possible to mentor people online, on a team and individual level, on an official and unofficial basis.

Of course, there are different types of remote work environments. There are teams with distributed members, teams where some people work from home and others work in the office, teams that occasionally go to the office, and so on. You need to consider the intricacies of your specific work situation as you build your online mentoring program.

Establish trust and rapport

For all the challenges of remote mentoring, there’s also something quite egalitarian about it. Research shows that visual status cues signaling organizational status and physical stature are minimized in video-based conversations. It makes sense: everyone is reduced to a voice and a window of equal size on screen, which means no one is left feeling small or worrying they take up too much space. In this egalitarian setup, establishing trust and rapport can actually become simpler.

How to Master the Art of Remote Mentoring

Although the “where” and, in many cases, the “when” we work may be different, working remotely is not the same as working in isolation. Or, in the case of hybrid workplaces, having to wait until "office days" to really interact with the team.

If we are actively striving to create a culture of distance, our online interactions in the workplace can and should be just as meaningful as our IRL interactions. And it should permeate every aspect of the workplace: not just our daily tasks or meetings, but also our collaborative efforts and our training strategy.

Workplace mentoring should also fall under this umbrella.

An extremely valuable practice that can make younger and returning employees successful, mentoring remains essential, but it must also be suitable for remote and virtual environments. Consider this article your introduction to remote mentoring for employees.

The Challenges of Online Mentoring

Mentorship is a personal matter. And it should be: the mentor and the mentee must establish a relationship of trust if the knowledge provided is to have an effect.

While this process is never easy at first, it is further complicated by the perceived distance that working remotely entails. The idea of virtual mentorship seems counter-intuitive or "missing" to many precisely because they fail to see how this bond of trust can be established without the physical presence of the mentor in the professional life of the mentee.

Workplace mentoring doesn't always happen in a specific space or context. Much of it is informal and spontaneous – and these are exactly the traits that people don't know how to replicate mentoring in a virtual environment.

Without a doubt, the personal time between a mentor and a mentee is the best way to read social cues and see how the other person reacts to what you say. But with remote mentoring, the only replacement is video conferencing apps like Zoom or Skype, which can add to pre-existing screen fatigue. This creates the need to keep meetings short and to the point, which in turn takes away some of the opportunities to truly connect on a human level.

For remote mentoring to be successful, you need to adapt your strategy. Duplicating what you did when you were working personally will not be as effective.

Yet mentoring is now more important than ever. As companies spin fast to catch up with changing times and many employees have to re-enter the workplace after an extended absence, the already large skills gap is widening. A 2020 McKinsey report found that 43% of leaders reported existing skills gaps within their teams. More than one HR manager in two interviewees agreed that their company is facing a skills shortage.

Mentoring can guide young workers and returning workers through the reintegration and remote retraining/upskilling process to bridge the skills gap before it becomes a skills gap.

Create a virtual mentorship program

In case it wasn't already clear: it's entirely possible to guide people online, at a team and individual level, on an official and unofficial basis.

Of course, there are different types of remote work environments. There are teams with dispersed members, teams where some people work from home and some work in the office, teams that come to the office occasionally, etc. You need to consider the intricacies of your particular work situation when designing your online mentoring program.

Building trust and understanding

Despite all the challenges of remote mentoring, there is also something quite egalitarian about it. Research shows that visual status cues indicating organizational status and physical stature are minimized in video chats. It makes sense: everyone is reduced to one voice and an equal-sized window on the screen, meaning no one feels small or worried about taking up too much space. In this egalitarian setting, establishing trusting relationships can become even easier.

The first step to gaining your mentee's trust is to listen. Listen to their concerns, goals, and dreams, as well as the challenges they face at work and in life in general. Don't assume you know what they want or need just because you are the mentor.

To ask questions; to pay attention. The next time they're unsure about something, they might not be able to physically walk past your desk. But if they know you're listening, it becomes much easier to use the remote communication tools available to them (more on that below) and write you a quick message or leave a voicemail.

One way to build this relationship, despite the distance IRL, is to spend time at the start of each meeting chatting and sharing thoughts with your mentee. If you don't know where to start, you can try team-building exercises that can possibly take place online. You can also have more casual Zoom lunches, where you can share a meal and talk about things (including work) in a more relaxed way.

Define expectations and logistics

Remote workplace orientation requires better planning. From deciding how often to communicate with which platforms you feel comfortable using, setting clear boundaries from the start gives the mentoring relationship a chance to thrive.

For example, due to Zoom fatigue, it may be best for the majority of your communication to happen via email or through a messaging app like Discord or Slack. Or, due to flexible working hours, weekly check-in is not always possible, in which case alternative solutions must be found. Certain days may be prohibited for religious or personal reasons. And if you and your mentee live in different time zones, keep that in mind as well.

That's why remote work tools are virtual mentorship's best friends. Wherever you will discuss the most, the working documents should be in a common and previously agreed place. It could be a shared Google doc, Notion doc, Basecamp, Padlet, or any other constantly synced, cloud-based tool.

When it comes to meetings, scheduling tools like Doodle make it easy to find and block time slots that work for both of you. You can also share your calendars to understand everyone's workload and which days would be too busy to log in.

Different mentees have different needs: some will need more strength in the hand, while others will do better if left to their own devices. Determining the right check-in level each time will take some trial and error, but the better you know your mentee, the easier it will be to know when to step back and when to check in on them.

Find the right coaching model for each mentee (and for you)

But in addition to the right level of registration for each mentee, you also need to find the right coaching model for them (and the one that works best for you). There are different coaching models depending on whether you prefer to focus on problems, solutions, or the whole process as part of a more holistic approach.

For example, the GROW (Goal Reality Options Will) coaching framework is a simple four-step process that starts with setting a goal and then reverse-engineers your journey from there. It involves a lot of brainstorming and gives the mentee a lot of power to chart their own path—something that can be powerful for some, but overwhelming for others. Other coaching models, such as OSKAR (Outcome, Scale, Know-how, Affirm + Action, and Review), have a more collaborative approach and are more focused on affirmations.

Finding the right coaching model (or creating your own approach) depends not only on the personality of your mentee and your own time constraints but also on the size of the project they wish to undertake.

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